Today I did something that warms my heart. When I first got divorced and decided I wanted to travel for work, times were dark. I had been robbed, with only enough money to buy my trip to China. I would arrive 4 months later with a few suitcases holding all my earthly belongings, mostly books. In my wallet was $200 and my accounts back home were at $0. Bill collectors were shouting down my neck to pay for the multiple operations I provided for my ex husband. But still, as I woke up in that hostel, 2 blocks from the bund in old Shanghai, I was filled with so many emotions. Anxiety from my exes words, that I would fail. I would end up an illegal, broke American female in a distant uncaring land. The first few days of weird events including being trapped in a bathroom because I was not aware that toilet paper would be a non-existent entity inside the stall. But after the awkwardness faded away and I got used to the stares, I was able to relax. But I was still struggling. The demons of my past haunted me. But this decision ultimately saved my emotional life, and China will always hold a very special place in my heart for it. I met people who were there for me. People with that same passion to experience life and live it to the fullest. I still have my bad periods, and probably always will. But this life has given me something I never had in America. Security. I am not living by counting my change and choosing which bills I can hold off on paying. I can travel, eat well, and still save for the future.
I like helping people. It makes me feel good, and today I was able to pay all the kindness I’ve received forward to one of the nicest people I’ve met here. Her name is Martie. I understand feeling like there isn’t an option for escape from a bad situation. I am in a position where I can help her because I know she needs the help. I do hope that this starts a ripple of positive moments in our lives and in the lives of others. I feel $1,000 is a small price to pay in order to create a catalyst that can help people who just need that support for a moment. A step up to build a future.
A smile shines in my mind and heart today. I know many can’t do this, but you can do SOMETHING! give your leftovers to someone battling hunger. Hold a door for someone overloaded with bags. anything. These small, seemingly inconsequential moments, may not be small to them.
peace, love and light.
Wendi
atermis0249 
Powerful post. Serving others pays us such huge dividends in the end, even if to help us feel less powerless in our world. Glad you can share such wise insight after your experience.
Yeah, I am going through the end of another relationship. I decided to leave the gate running. The more positive the better. It’s hard to change your mind back from a pair to a single again. But, it is the way things go sometimes. I’m just working on being more aware of how I can help spreading hope and love. God knows we, humans, spread enough negativity.
You are doing your part to promote positivity. Thinking of you!
I was captured by your story here right away. Your courage is unbelievable, especially during a time that had to have been impossible to process at times. You are a model for pulling through. Very powerful post.
I applaud your courage in traveling to China to seek a better life for yourself and your generosity toward a friend in need.
This is why you are awesome. I am so encouraged by your positivity even in the tough times. So glad Martie has a friend like you to help her! Pay it forward, and it will always come back to you!